Look Buddy, Don't Mess With Me

I'm flushed with the excitement of having had to turn on some New York "I don't take any shit" attitude to get a decent room here at the Westin Horton Plaza.

I arrived here about an hour ago. Walking into the hotel, the first view you get is of the lobby bar, which tonight was brimming with solitary geeky guys, tapping away at their laptops, with all sorts of wacky little gizmos dangling from ears, necks, and pinned to shirts. I wouldn't have been shocked had I bumped into a cyborg of some sort. My Brother and I hypothesized that although very few of these folks were willing or able to talk to one another in person, they very well might have been carrying on animated conversations on their computers, sitting just feet from one another.

I checked in without incident, and headed on up to my 11th (moderately high) floor room. It stunk! A smoking room! Took a minute to get up the energy, but I relatively quickly turned on my heel and marched back down to the front desk.

I started out nice about it: "Hi, I'd reserved a non-smoking room, but you've given me a smoking one, and it smells pretty bad. I'd like a non-smoking room please."

"No non-smoking rooms available, maam."

Agh. Don't "maam" me! That's not the way to my heart. I much preferred it when the United flight attendant looked skeptical when I asked for a beer, was shocked when I told him I was 28, and then told me I definitely looked too young to be ordering beer. It might have been nothing more than a customer service routine on his part, but it was okay by me!

Still fairly nice, but not to be dissuaded, I asked, "Surely, there must be one room left? Perhaps on one of your other floors?" (I was hinting at the fact that I knew that an upgrade might solve this lack of rooms situation.)

Tap tap tap on the computer, and "no, nothing available tonight. We can ionize your room for you."

Unacceptable.

Tap tap tap. "We can move you to a non-smoking room tomorrow."

Unacceptable.

Tap tap tap. "We can put you into a parlor room. These rooms, however, don't have our signature Heavenly bed."

Unacceptable! I played up the "I'm a tired traveler" routine for all it was worth. I mean, I had just been on a plane for an entire exhausting hour.

"Look, I've been traveling, it's late, and all I want is a room with a comfortable bed that doesn't stink, and I want it tonight. Could you please check again?"

Mr. Front Desk consulted quietly with Ms. Front Desk, and then disappeared behind the door to the back office. About a minute later, he reappeared, and tap tap tap, issued me a new key. And here I sit, in a non-smoking, beautiful, newly renovated, extra large room with a king size "signature Heavenly bed."

Victory is sweet. And there's my dinner knocking at the door....

Comments

[Kathleen]

not that i'm saying that you don't look young, and a flight attendant would have no reason to do this, but when i tend bar, i often card people who are *obviously* old enough to drink because it flatters them and they leave you bigger tips.

: )

[jess]

Oh sure, I definitely realize that he might have said that just to make me happy. Regardless, it's a lot better than being called "maam!"

[Kathleen]

oh, don't get me wrong. i TOTALLY agree. i am over the moon when i get carded (and i'm the same age as you).